The Unbelievable Secrets Of Draco Malfoy
by AmyKuroNeko
Summary: This Fanfiction is about the many secrets of Draco Malfoy. Secrets about his thoughts, feelings, family and other mysterious things, which he has to deal with from time to time. In this story these secrets are going to be revealed. And suddenly he realizes that talking to People isn't even that bad sometimes. [Drarry] (includes 2 OC) WARNING: Contains stuff that could trigger .
1. Prolog

Prolog

_I'm perfect_.He thought. _I'm the best. _He thought. That's what he was told by his parents. The perfect child. He was proud, cold, had manners, was good looking, he could sing, play instruments, could draw and had a secret power that could be the ultimate weapon. A child parents can be proud of.

It was his first year at Hogwarts School of witchcraft and wizardry, he had the best grades of his house. But not the best of his year. He knew his parents would be disappointed maybe even sad or worse they wouldn't be proud anymore, ashamed of their perfect child. Therefore, he tried even harder to make them love him. It made him sad.

It was his second year at Hogwarts School of witchcraft and wizardry, He was only second best in his year. His parents would be so ashamed if he wouldn't be honoured this year. They seemed sad when he told them he wasn't best in his first. So he did everything to be the best. He got to be a part of the Quidditch-Team, so he had to be best there also. With an amazing new broom, his father got him and the team, they needed to win. However, they didn't. He blamed himself for everything. He wanted to be their perfect child so bad. It made him even sadder.

It was his third year at Hogwarts School of witchcraft and wizardry, he still wasn't the best. He thought. So many of the younger Slytherins looked up to him. He wanted to be perfect for them and of course his parents. He never was pleased with his efforts, he never thought it was good enough, he never thought he did everything he could have done to be the best. It made him so unbelievably sad.

It was his fourth year at Hogwarts School of witchcraft and wizardry, he still wasn't good enough, he thought. So he became colder. He also even started to tease his own housemates. Because he couldn't bare the stares anymore. They knew he wasn't perfect. And he was sure he saw them whispering, definitely about him and how pathetic he was. Things started to change at the Manor to, they weren't visiting the other part of the family anymore. His parents became so brutal, so cold, so ... unlike them. The dark Lord was there again, and his parents were his biggest supporters, his perfect world was falling apart. He was so sad, he was depressed.

It was his fifth year at Hogwarts School of witchcraft and wizardry, No one looked up to him anymore, they were scared. Nevertheless, he wasn't like his parents, he was scared himself, he didn't want to follow the same path as they did. But he had to...to make them proud. He needed all the perfection back, at least were he could. Of course he couldn't change his parents, but he could change himself. Now he was angry, cold-hearted, didn't even smile with his friends. He missed the other part of his Family, so he convinced his parents to let him go over Christmas. He tried to flee into a world full of love and warm-hearted people. He enjoyed the time with his grandma, and _her _she never has been the perfect child, that's why she lived with their grandma in France. Their parents couldn't bare her. But he still loved her because she was his, his little girl. His sister. He loved his Grandmas food, especially the Christmas Dinner. When he came back to school, one of his housemates said something and he broke, he said, "you really loved the food where you were, huh ?". First, he didn't know what he meant, but then he realized... He said he was fat, that's what he thought. He needs to lose weight, he thought. He became more depressed.

It was his sixth year at Hogwarts School of witchcraft and wizardry, he wished for perfection. He needed to follow his parent's footsteps. It was unbearable for him. He was exhausted all the time, because he was still in need to get in shape. He couldn't see that his body was perfect. He tried talking to his parents, if he really had to do all of this. He wasn't as dark as everyone thought. But he didn't want to disappoint even more people around him. He never stopped trying to convince his parents for the "good-side", but every time he asked, he was beaten up. It was unbearable for him. They want him to be evil, to be cold, to not care about anyone, they wanted him to kill. He couldn't. Living, now was unbearable for him. He was so depressed he didn't know what to do.

It was his seventh year at Hogwarts School of witchcraft and wizardry, he only wanted his old live back, he wanted to flee to his grandma, just to have someone to hold in his arms. He started to be always tired, from exercising and not eating, he was skinny but his body was still in perfect shape, ha had a bit if everything, defined abs, a little bit of muscle definitions on his arms and back, and a cute butt. Everyone wanted to have a body like he has. In his seventh year he had to do so much he never even could think about, he was part of the "evil-side", that fact destroyed him from the inside. If Potter just killed him last year, he wouldn't have to deal with all this. He needed to find relief from his pain. He didn't know where he got this from, he didn't know why he considered it. But it was the first time he took a blade, pushed it into his skin and pulled it across his forearm, he began to cut himself, in deep small, or fine long cuts along his arms and thighs. In the final battle of war, he finally convinced his parents to go back to France to his grandma and sister. His parents never loved his sister she was never like them, she was never a true Malfoy, she was a happy loving and caring young girl. If his parents only knew that, he was like her in the inside. But he needed to keep his facade of the oh so perfect son. He wrote letters to his friends, wanting to know how everything is going on at home... yes Hogwarts was his home. They told him that some of the seventh years could go back to get their N.E. he really wanted to, now that he didn't need to be on the dark side anymore. He wanted to go home so badly, he missed his friends. He knew it was save to go back home. Even though it would break his grandmas and sisters heart. One day while eating, he had the courage to tell.

"Mother, Father..." he paused, "I want to go back to Hogwarts".


	2. Chapter 1

_**Secrets**_

_**Chapter 1**_

"Mother, Father..." he paused. " I want to go back to Hogwarts."

"You want what? " Lucius asked in disbelief. "Are you trying to make fun of me?" His voice was getting lower and much more furious. Draco's face steadily looking more afraid of what's going to come. "Do you really think, after fleeing to this place, you could go back and act like nothing happened? Do you think that"? Draco just shook his head, eyes closed and terrified because of his own father. "Draco, outside! NOW!" Lucius stood up and walked out in a fast and angry pace. Just after he left the room, Draco stormed out, to not let his father wait to long. The three females left at the table just sat there in shock. Two of them because of Lucius reaction and one of them because of Draco's words.

Outside Grandma Malfoy's House Lucius began to yell at his son. "Are you trying to make a fool out of our family name, by going back to that place?" Draco just shook his head again. "Are you thinking they would even let you go back? After all that has happened? What are you doing if this is only a trap to capture your mother, and me huh? Do you want that? "Finally he has a chance to answer. " However, father no... of course I don't want you to get arrested."

"Then want do you want?" the older man questioned curiously. "I just want to get my NEWTs" Draco answered. "Just _**I**_ want go there, you can still stay here. I just want to graduate properly. In addition, I _**am**_ allowed to go back, otherwise they wouldn't have told me in the first place. Please? "The almost white haired boy sounded desperate. The look on his face, pleading. His father gave him a disgusted look. "You are nothing better than your sister, in no single way." His voice was calm, too calm. Lucius didn't even finish talking, as he pushed his son to the ground, kicking him in the stomach. Panting heavily the younger Malfoy tried to stand up, to not look weak. He felt tears creeping into his eyes, Draco really didn't want to seem powerless, so he was blinking them away rapidly. His fragile body was hurting, he was desperately doing his best not to show his pain. "I will talk to your mother about it. Don't even dare to manipulate her. And get out of my sight" With these words of his father, he immediately left the yard and ran to the near forest.

Meanwhile at the table. "Am I allowed to go to my room?" The young girl, who's name is Allison Evelyn Malfoy-Moliere, questioned the two other Women with big eyes. Narcissa opened her mouth to tell her to sit down, but Grandma Malfoy-Moliere was quicker and allowed her beloved Granddaughter to go. While giving Narcissa a calming and understanding smile." Let her go, I want her to keep her carefree attitude." She whispered, while taking Narcissa's Hands in hers. "She is not a _true _Malfoy, but she is still your and Lucius' daughter. Nevertheless, I raised her, and she is living by my rules. Not yours. It is hard enough for me to see Draco suffer." "What do you mean my suffering? He has and gets everything he wants and deserves. And with this ourconversation is over." The blond and black haired woman hissed. In the meantime, the other one positioned herself in the big puffy armchair. Narcissa just shook her head and walked away towards the guestroom, opened the door and closed it soundly behind her.

After Narcissa had gone, Allison crept out of the corner at the stairs and sat down on the comfortable floral sofa, looking extremely concerned. „You noticed it to, didn't you? " The elderly lady asked, while knitting light pink socks. „Yes, they are so different. " she realised sounding sad. „Mommy and daddy are both extremely aggressive towards Dray, they seen really affected by the war, by you-know-who, by being Death eaters. And Dray… he is … so so sad. I haven't seen him smiling since over a year, and every time he was here, he wore stylish clothes. Now, all he wears is a highneck shirt, long sleeves, only black… his hair …. It looks awful, so strict. When he's usually here, his hair is cool and trendy, he never had it stuck to his head like glue. He had a fringe and gelled the back upwards. He has really dark tired eyes. He usually wears a bit of make up." „Really? " The older woman asked surprised and in disbelief. „ Mh, yes. Especially when he looks tired. A little bit of concealer and eyeliner." There was silence in the room. „I'm really worried about him." Hugging her knees while talking, she watched the birds outside. _He deserves to be free like them. He is too good for this world. Hopefully they let him go, he needs to escape this family. _A small tear was sneaking its way over her cheek. She went upstairs into her room and started crying. She was crying because she doesn't want to see anyone suffer, especially not her beloved brother.

Draco ran into the near Forest, he really didn't want to cry in front of his family. The two Malfoys would accuse him for being weak, and the two others would worry too much and he didn't want them to feel bad. As soon as he was out of sight, he stumbled to a huge tree, sliding down and sitting into the moist grass beneath him. _What did I do wrong? I only want them to be proud, I want to graduate properly like everyone else. Why do all bad things that happen come back to me, and I'm being punished for it? I must have done something wrong. I must. I really can't do anything right. _Tears are still dribbling down the white soft skin of his cheeks, but he remained silent, he didn't know what could hide inside of these woods. He definitely didn't want do draw attention towards him. It hurts him so much to think he did something wrong, so he did what he always does. A small package in taken out of his pocket. He opens it and tiny little blades are shining in his hands. After looking at them for over a minute he decides he couldn't take it any longer. So he grabbed one of them, rolled his left sleeve up to make scarred, shredded, pale skin visible. While looking at his arm he slowly touches his arm, caressing the many many scars and cuts all over. Sunken into his own little world he clutches his fingers around the blade and set it to a part if skin on his arm, pushing into it and dragging along. Several cuts later he finds relieve and quickly packed his stack of different blades away, just to watch the steady dribble of the blood and open wounds he just created. He sighed and let his head fall back. The sight of his blood makes him calm and feel alive. It's slowly starting to get dark so he decides to go back in the hope no one would notice him entering the house. He stands up just to find himself quite dizzy, because he hadn't eaten today. He is proud of himself when he doesn't eat for an entire day, it makes him feel good enough for being disciplined. Getting back from his dizziness he walks back until he sees that his sleeve is still rolled up and his arm bloody and sticky. After casting a cleaning charm he covered his arm and continued his walk to the front door. He enters, looks around just to see if someone sees him. Then he crept into his room, making sure to not disturb anyone. In his room he falls onto the bed, being completely exhausted. He enjoyed the silence, until someone opened the door and entered the room. Slightly terrified who this was he turned around just to see his sister crying. And he is absolutely aware she knows that he has been crying too. He stood up, wanting to say something, but she already pulled him into a tight hug, full of sadness, worry and so much more. He couldn't stand his sister being sad so he wrapped his arms around the smaller girl. "You've been crying." She said. It wasn't a question, it was a fact, and they both knew it was absolutely true.


End file.
